I Had to Wax My Chest..

 A Mason Always Pays His Debts.


Been gone for a minute, now I'm back again..  

So last fantasy football season, I came in last place in one of my leagues.  This particular league, provided me an opportunity to not only fulfill my duties as the worst manager aka The Swipes, but to also provide some insight into one of the most intimidating metrosexual acts that haunt men everywhere.  I got my chest waxed. 


I'll be honest, I put this off for months.  The thought of my hair being torn from my beloved chest kept me up at night.  During the week leading up to my appointment, I spent hours online reading post after post of horrific side effects.  From body-wide pimples to long-lasting rashes, I couldn't believe I let myself do this!  


But it wasn't as bad as I thought.  First of all, for a total chest and stomach wax, the whole thing took less than 20 minutes.  My technician was flying, rythmatically prepping one area for wax while forcefully ripping another.  Now, the ripping part is painful..no lie. My tech was very good about immediately applying pressure to the ripped area, an act that dramatically lessens the shock that comes from this whole process.  Really hairy areas hurt the worst; luckily for me, my entire front side is really hairy.  But if I can get through it, I imagine anyone can.    


A few things to keep in mind for those thinking about getting wax.  First, exfoliate.  Exfoliating the area you plan to treat at least a few hours prior to your appointment will open the hair follicles and should make your waxing a bit easier.  Second,  do not trim your hair prior to your wax.  Better to leave your hair too long than for it to be too short which makes it difficult to wax.  Lastly, don't plan on working out or taking a hot shower for at least 6-8 hours after you're done.  I made the mistake of taking a Luke -warm shower a few hours after my appointment and a hundred red angry dots appeared all over.  This is a natural reaction that tends to last about 24 hours.  You can avoid a more dramatic reaction by taking a cold shower instead.

All in all, I kind of like the way my body looks right now.  It's been a few years since I've had a bare chest.  Back in the day, I use to shave my chest and stomach but stopped because it required 3-4 shaves per week.  As I'm writing this post, it has been a week since my wax and still no sign of hair anywhere.  Would I do it again? Perhaps. This experience wasn’t nearly as traumatic as I thought it would be. But to be honest, I wouldn't have done this in the first place if I weren't so bad at fantasy football.  Oh well, when life gives you lemons..